#Microblog Monday – Time is Moving Too Fast!

I am a very involved Auntie. I go to all the school plays, swim meets, talent shows, birthday parties, as well as babysit my nephews at least once a week. They’re the closest thing to motherhood I have, and I love every second and am so thankful to have sisters who are happy to let me be so involved. It really has been my lifeline in these latter years of infertility and each moment I spend with these boys helps mend my heart.

In just one week my middle nephew, the one who I take care of 5 days a week, is starting Kindergarten. And I am not, in any way, shape or form, ready. You would think it wouldn’t bother me because he’s not my son, but let me tell you – it makes me so sad. I have kissed those little toes, wiped that bum and patiently helped teach that little boy how to crawl, walk, run, sing, spell his name, build a sandcastle, use the potty, play cards and all the other things you teach little ones. I have fought with him over nap times, and bed time, and given him 1 million and two baths. I have held him while he cried, and bartered with him to take his medicine during his third, fourth, fifth ear infection in two years. I have laid awake worrying about him, and loved him more than I knew it was possible to love someone. He may not be my son, but he is my little Sweet Pea and it feels like just yesterday he was a cheerful little baby, just sitting up, and now I’ve blinked and here we are at 4 and about to start school.

Where has the time gone?


Slow down, little one, and let us enjoy your sweet, kind, gentle, uncomplicated and fun loving personality for just a little bit longer before you move off into the bigger world of school and peer pressure and everything else that comes with it.

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Good Friends

When I was younger (teen to early 20s), I lived for my friends. Nothing could cure my teenage angst like a day spent doing nothing along side my besties. Even when our bodies were changing, and our emotions were roller coasters, and some of us were dealing with tragedies – a day spent watching movies and talking was what got us through.

Now, though, I’m at the age where all of my friends have small children. I was one of the first to get married, and the only without kids. While I still love spending time with my friends-who-are-now-mommies, it’s different than it used to be. Their priorities have changed (rightly so) and their lives are much different than mine.  One of the hardest parts is that when we do get together, there are so many wonderful parenting stories – but sometimes, I feel a bit sad or insecure about my infertility. That onus is on me, I know, but it happens just the same. I love my friends dearly, but it is hard on me when all we ever discuss is the one thing I cannot seem to obtain but want so desperately. Even getting together is a challenge – and something I’m starting to realize may not happen until all the kids are a bit older. I’m ok with that, I love those girls dearly and I will wait for them. But … I’m lonely and I miss my friends.

Then something interesting happened. I developed a couple friendships with four girls from work that initially became working relationships, and have since developed into a deeper friendships. All of the girls love children, but don’t have any for varying reasons: choice, health, circumstance, etc. Last week we went out for drinks after work and stayed for hours just talking about life and movies and good books. It was wonderful. I had forgotten how much life there is outside of parenting…for so long my focus has been zeroed in on how to have a baby, and having a baby, that I had forgotten there are other good things in life, too.

It was a wonderful distraction from infertility. For the first time in a long time, I did not feel like the infertile in a room full of mothers. I was just another person, enjoying a nice meal and great conversation with good friends. It was so needed. I am so glad to call these girls friends.

Do you have a mix of mommy and non-mommy friends? Do you find it more difficult or more easy to identify with one over the other?



#MicroblogMondays – Journals

I have been trying to build a regular journal routine – because I really do feel better in general when I journal. I have always been one who loves colour so I write only in markers – and I change colour regularly through each entry.

I also doodle in my journal. Sometimes, that’s all I can find the energy for…like right now. I seem to have writer’s block and all I can come up with are doodles. The nice part is, I sometimes find that doodling in colour is all I need to feel good.

Do you journal? What do you use/do when you have writers block? What do you write with? Do you have a preference to journal style and/or writing medium?

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#Thursday Thoughts – Notebooks!

Is anyone else a notebook junkie?

Nothing tickles my fancy like going to chapters, perusing the notebook section and smelling their delicious, freshly cut pages and binding (TMI?).

I also love to write with markers in my notebooks because blue pen is just too blah for me (plus, all of my writing is filled with colourful doodles). So imagine my excitement when I discovered ERASABLE markers?!?!?! AND they actually work! Woot woot!


Are you a notebook junkie? Do you have a preference in writing tools?

Book Review – Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

Like most Potter fans – I was thrilled to learn there would be a new book and even though I wasnt thrilled it was a screen play – I still couldn’t wait to learn what was happening at Hogwarts.

I wasn’t disappointed. Bearing in mind that it is a sequel – and sequels are rarely as good as the original – I thoroughly enjoyed it. Having read and seen the movies, I had no problem imagining the scenes in my mind. Sure, I miss what a novel would have provided but the story itself was thrilling and exciting and true to the HP franchise.

I do have to note – I am a bit disappointed by the character they turned Ron into. While the young Ron bares a lot in common with the older Ron, I had hoped time, experience and parenthood might mold him a little differently than the writers did. I also missed the involvement of the supporting characters – where are the Weaselys and Neville and even Dudley? All strong supporting characters in the first series, and all but absent in the second.Then again – its a screenplay, not a novel, so I suppose this is to be expected.

Anyway – despite a few lackings – it’s definitely a good read and I truly hope this unleashes the beginning of a new set of HP books! Many, MANY, are expressing outrage over this book – but I am simply excited for another HP story.

Have you read it? Do you plan to? What did/do you think?