#Microblog Mondays – PCOS is Fickle

Has anyone noticed how fickle some reproductive conditions can be?

I have PCOS. It’s supposed to be what is causing my infertility, yet the only symptoms I have are irregular cycles (range between 28-42 days), occasional annovulation and a visibly polycystic ovary noted on my last laproscopic surgery. Yet I know people with PCOS, with pretty much every symptom in the book, who are conceiving easily and without issue.

What gives? Why does PCOS chose some people and not others? How come it seems like every PCOSer I know, who is not doing half of the things I’m doing to be healthy, is getting pregnant while I remain barren?

I’m trying really hard not to be bitter or jealous, but I’m losing that battle. I’m not even sure if it’s bitterness or jealousy, it’s mostly just incredible, consuming sadness.

Sometimes, life stinks.

What do you do to get away from the bitterness/jealousy/sadness?

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8 thoughts on “#Microblog Mondays – PCOS is Fickle

  1. PCOS does seem to be a fickle thing. I know a woman of 38 at work who was ambivalent about having children but thought she’d try anyway as she was nearing 40. She told me she had PCOS (and she was sick of her symptoms, which included weight gain, hirsuteness, some skin problems; constant cysts too etc) and she was sure that it might never happen anyway. She conceived pretty much straight away and got the shock of her life when it happened so soon. Her doctor told her that women with PCOS often become more fertile as they get older?? It seems to be quite arbitrary in how it affects different women. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling down; it’s normal to feel bitter and jealous so don’t beat yourself up about those thoughts. It’s very all-consuming and hard to find a way to get away from it as it takes over your life. I’d say try to get away and do something unusual; remove yourself from any triggers and take it easy. Easier said than done though, I know that! Greetings to you x

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  2. Fertility IMPROVES with age? Wow. I hope so!
    What I wish is that there was better research about PCOS. There are so many things that I still haven’t understood – like what’s the fundamental cause? why are there inconsistent symptoms (across people and over time)? The list goes on.

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    • Me too! What shocks me is that Infertility is one of the symptoms of PCOS, but not everyone with it has it (actually, I think it’s something like 50 ish %). So there are plenty of women with PCOS who have zero problems getting pregnant….wth? What’s the difference? It will drive me to the madhouse wondering. I agree, we need much better research into it – especially considering it is supposed to be very common. I would love to know what exactly causes it? It’s supposed to be genetic, and a LOT of my family (my mom has 8 sisters, and they have 2+ daughters) have the more common PCOS symptoms, and it’s probably pretty likely some of them have it – but I am the ONLY one who cannot conceive. I’d love to know why… it’s truly very under researched.

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      • Yeah, I totally agree. It’s supposed to be 10% of the (female) population but honestly, it feels like not much is really known about it. And the symptoms don’t even seem to be predictive of fertility issues. As for the genetics – I’m pretty sure no one in my family had PCOS (and everyone conceived promptly within a year of marriage). Such a strange disease.

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  3. PCOS is totally fickle. I really enjoyed watching other people with PCOS get pregnant easily with IVF, seemingly because they had the “good kind” that responded well to drugs and created good quality embryos. I apparently had the “bad kind” — I get to go have my face waxed and feel that I’m constantly fighting the flub (or just succumbing to a point) and I didn’t have success with fertility treatments. I had a boatload of follicles but they always whittled down to a disappointing(ish) number of embryos, that then didn’t stick around for long or at all. It’s hard not to be bitter when others have a similar diagnosis and seem to have NO ISSUE getting pregnant without assistance or with minimal assistance. When I’m feeling bitter I try to find something positive about things, or (in a very un-positive way) I read a book about a situation that’s way worse then mine to feel better. Or imagine the negatives of the lives of those who have what I wanted but couldn’t have. One way is more socially acceptable than the other, but it’s all what works for you! 🙂 I hope you feel better. It sucks to see others have very little trouble with something that is apparently the source of yours.

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  4. PCOS is a weird, weird thing – I’m semi-convinced that some day, if the syndrome is ever studied more, researchers are going to wind up breaking it into either more than one condition or into sub-categories with more narrowly defined boundaries.

    The sadness/bitterness/jealousy is tough. I used to use the first half of my work-out/runs to just allow myself to be as angry/sad/bitter/jealous as I wanted, then use the second half to focus on deep breathing and calming some. One of the other things I did was remind myself that it was okay to feel deep grief at the many losses of infertility and that it would take time to work through that. It sucks, and I’m sorry you’re having to deal with it.

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