#microblogmondays – Break

Hey! I have been pretty quiet lately…I took a much needed break but I am back, refreshed, and ready to get to it!

Everything is good here. Status quo right now, although I did ovulate all my self (woot woot). But for the first time in FOREVER we actually did not act on my ovulation because we’re going to Vegas in 5 weeks. I know…crazy right? I can’t remember the last time a positive ovulation test didn’t send us running for the bedroom…but it just didn’t. And it was kind of nice, to be honest. I mean I don’t want this long term because we WANT a baby – but it was nice to take a little break, too.


Anyway – back to Vegas…this is our first time going and we’re SO excited! Have you been? Tell me everything I need to see / do / eat while we’re there!

For more on Microblog Mondays, click here.



#microblogmondays – Bored

The worst part, by far, about waiting to get pregnant is the boredom. I’m bored. At home I’m bored….I almost dread the weekends. And it’s not like I don’t have stuff to do – my house is spotless, I play violin, read, walk, meditate, play games, socialize with friends, go fishing with Mr. Big, go snowmobiling with Mr. Big, etc.  We have plenty of hobbies.

But I’m bored for what I don’t have – early morning snuggles with a little in feety pajamas. Arguments over the way I cut their toast. Noise, constant noise. Lessons learned the hard way. Cartoons that make me want to gauge my eyes out. I want those things, so badly. I hate that my house is clean and neat and silent. I hate that there are no rubber duckies in my tub, or jam stuck to my light beige furniture.

Being at home – which has always been a place of refuge for me – is quickly becoming the place where my heart aches for what it doesn’t have.

Ugh. #Infertilitysucks

*For more on Microblogmondays – click here.

#Microblogmondays – Inflatable Belts

I work in healthcare…and one of the biggest issues we see is frequent falls of aging/delirious patients. There are a million and one resources to help prevent falls without actually restraining patients, but it’s just not something that we seem to be able to eliminate. These fragile patients take a fairly basic fall, but due to their age, osteoporosis, etc. – they tend to shatter. Broken hips, broken arms, broken pelvis – etc. One of the committees I sit on is dedicated to finding ways to lessen the damage falls do (because patients will always continue to fall)….recently, an interesting topic has come up:

Inflatable belts. Yep…inflatable pads on either hip, belted together, to protect the hips. Essentially, airbags for hips.

Crazy, right? I think it’s a genius idea! Yes – they are not fashionable but neither is a broken/dislocated hip. The patients who would get the most benefit from this are not worried about fashion anyway – they are upper end seniors with other medical conditions far less glamorous than a couple air bags belted to their waist. Plus, the longer their bones and joints remain undamaged – the faster they can get home, which is what we all really want anyway.

What do you think? Anyone you know who could use them?

#microblogmondays – Showers

In the last year, everyone around me seems to be getting engaged, married, home buying or having babies. So my calendar is full of showers of all shapes and sizes.

I’ve noticed a bizarre trend across the board: requesting your guests bring gift cards or cash only.

Has anyone else encountered that?

When I married Mr. Big, we lived across the country from our parents. We eloped. When we went home to have a big party with our families, we requested no gifts – just the gift of their presence. My MIL wanted us to requests cash/ giftcards and I refused. I was raised that gifts are just that: gifts. Something thoughtful from the giver, within their rights to chose what, how much, who and when…and I am and always will be very thankful for every gift I get. I have yet to ever take a single gift back for any reason (except when it’s the wrong size, and then just to change sizes). A gift is a gift, and I am so thankful to have people who love me enough to spend their hard earned money on me, no matter how large or small the amount is.

So … I’m not really sure what to make of this new request… what if I don’t want to give you cash or a gift card? (Truthfully, normally I would – I think just being TOLD I need to, makes me not want to). What if I want to get you a perfectly lovely teapot because I know you love tea? Or a perfectly lovely duvet cover because yours is all worn? Or tickets to a show I know you’ll enjoy? Or what if I couldn’t afford to do any of those things and I was going to spend $8 on some warm, snuggly fleece and spend the next 2 weeks quilting you a warm, snuggly blanket for your TV Room (that would retail at $200)….am I expected to, instead, tuck my $8 into an envelope for everyone to see and not feel any shame or embarrassment? Or am I expected to either come up with the remaining $92 or not come at all?

That’s the problem with insisting on cash gifts…it assigns a dollar value to something that cannot always be captured by a dollar sign. So it makes people feel bad…and the last thing I want at a shower is to feel bad or to make someone else feel bad.

What do you think? Have you been to one like this, or have you been someone who requested gift cards or cash? I’d love to hear your perspectives.

#Microblog Mondays – Christmas

For more #microblogmonday posts – please click here.

This weekend was busy – beginning with a visit to the Christmas Market after work on Friday (sidenote: it is TOO FAR to go on a workday!). My girlfriends and I walked around in the cold night air, under the twinkling lights, sipping mulled cider and soaked it all in….this is TOTALLY going to be an annual tradition.


It was beautiful and put me right in the mood for some decorating…even though it’s usually a little early for me…I was so Christmas-ey when I got home that I just couldn’t wait!

Saturday – Mr. Big and I spent the day together…it was lovely and so, so needed. We had a busy morning shopping and running errands, and then a lazy afternoon.  We ended it with dinner out at a new restaurant, followed by our favourite Christmas movies (Home Alone 1 & 2) and the putting up of our decorations.


I also scored these adorable mugs for our Christmas morning tradition – I hope we get many, MANY more Christmases out of these two!


Sunday I had a baby shower that was emotionally draining (it was announced to everyone 3 different times that I was “next” … blarg), and so I bailed early and then spent the afternoon getting started on my Christmas card making. Just a handful of the styles I’m making this year:

While I love Christmas, I often find I am overwhelmed with the holidays – they’re emotionally draining, they’re busy, they’re family centered and they’re loud with a lot of expectations – but I’m slowly realizing that little things like special mugs and a quiet afternoon making cards really help me to get through it and still have a smile on my face. So even though I don’t have a “Baby’s First Christmas” ornament on my tree, or a cute little Christmas sweater that reads “Future Cookie Stealer” across the belly…I still have things to look forward to.

Have you put up your decorations yet? When do you do it?


#Microblogmondays – This.Is.Us

As per usual, I am one season behind the train on good shows. You guys, I JUST discovered This.Is.Us. Do you watch it? It is changing my world.

Let me rewind …this happened, followed by this. I know – even I can’t quite believe I shared something so difficult and intimate with all of you…but really, isn’t that what blogging is about? Oversharing in the hopes of helping/connecting with someone else? And I needed to write about it because…whether I like it or not this IS my life now, and this blog is about sharing my life: the good, the bad and the downright ugly (and this is ugly!). In the wake of this I was desperately looking for something to act as a distraction while I pieced together what remained of my marriage…and somehow I stumbled upon this show I have heard so much about.

I am in love with it. I love the characters, the I love the writing, I love the way each episodes unfolds to show a deeper, more complex layer of each character. I love how real, and normal, and entirely human they are. I love how easy it is to relate to it, and I love how emotional the show is. I pretty much love everything about it, even the cheesiness. It could not have come at a better time in my life.

Do you watch it? What do you think? What good shows are you watching right now?

Find more about MicroblogMondays here.



#Microblog Monday – Adoption Preparation

I feel like every has moved at a snail’s pace since we began this process – literally nothing happens quickly (except, perhaps, the actual placement one day).

For now, we’re waiting…waiting for dates on our parental training (mandatory for the type of adoption we’re doing) and home study. Until we get those dates, we can’t do much of anything except prepare our home and finances…so here are a few things we’re working on:

  1. Clearing out the three out buildings on our property. One is to be torn down, one moved to a better location and the third boarded up. (Also…sent Mr. Big to the dump with a load, he comes back horrified that I had almost thrown out his old CD’s from 1995 that he hasn’t touched in 500 years. Note to self: Don’t let Mr. Big go to the dump alone.)
  2. Dog training refresher to get our fur-babies manners up to date.
  3. Building an enclosed dog run outside – they normally have full run of the property, but then they enthusiastically greet anyone who shows up and not everyone likes that… I do not want them to smother the social worker…
  4. Sorting and organizing our paperwork. I am horrible at putting it all in a box and sealing it…which doesn’t make it easy to find the things we need!
  5. Preparing the spare bedroom for (hopefully) a new resident one day. We’re not buying any furniture except a dresser – because we don’t know if we will need a crib or a toddler bed or a bed…but I figured we can give it a new paint job, buy a nice rug and hang some artwork so it looks ready – or almost ready – for a new occupant.
  6. Purging my cupboards…I have accumulated a lot of stuff I don’t use and given how small our house is, it’s time to rehome it.
  7. Trying to convince Mr. Big to build me a full wall storage unit so we can move the things we’ve been storing in the spare room into the unit.

If anyone has any advice for the adoption process, and preparations, I would love to hear them!

For more information on #microblogmondays – check out Mel’s blog here.


#microblogmondays – The cure for IF

I have been having this painful problem with my neck for a year. I’ve been through the medical system, massage and physio and now have decided to try Chiro. (at this point, it’s worth a shot). I have mixed feelings about Chiropractics … I know lots of people who swear by it, but what unsettles me is that once they start going, they are never able to stop.

I had my consultation on Friday. I first filled out a mile long questionnaire, had some tests, and then chatted with the Doctor.

She began by asking me how many kids I have, to which I explained none. She then explained to me how infertility can be cured with an adjustment, and regular adjustments after. She explained how if I had come to her at the beginning of my fertility journey, she could have saved me from all of the meds, tests and pain. All the time she was explaining this, her assistant was nodding along enthusiastically.

I was so stunned, I just took the package she gave me and left without speaking my mind. Now I wish I had, but I will see her again tomorrow to find out how much her miracle cure will cost me (for my neck, not my infertility)…and I have been tossing around a few words in my head.

There is little that makes me more angry than people who swoop in, on the heels of years of treatment for one condition or another, and proclaim to have a miracle cure. Sure, the new person may have something helpful to offer – but pretending that your cure could have saved that person the years of treatment is both insulting and degrading. Do you honestly think I haven’t researched everything to find something to help? Do you honestly think my GP hasn’t spent more of her free time than she ever should researching the unorthodox treatments I’ve asked her opinion on? (she has, I have an amazing GP). Do you honestly think my GP is so cruel, and ignorant, that she wouldn’t refer me to this treatment if it proved to be valid sometime in the last 7 years? Or, if not her, then how about the other 5 specialists I have seen for my infertility? (My feelings on how the modern world loves to view Physicians as villains looking to prescribe anything that will line their pocket books is for another post, as it is both long and winded.)

I have to be honest, I would love to have them prove me wrong and for this to actually fix more than my neck – but let’s be realistic here. I understand how Chiro works and it is common sense that where there is a restriction in blood flow, there will be problems, and where there is a return to full blood flow, there will be improvement – but it is no miracle cure for infertility and the simple act of a few adjustments isn’t going to fix the condition I have grappled with for almost 7 years. Lastly, I didn’t come for infertility. I came for my neck, and would love to keep my treatment focused on that.

Do any of you go to a Chiropractor? Have you ever heard of this? Is she an odd-ball, or is this standard for Chiropractics?

See here for more information on how you can participate too.

#Microblogmondays – Things I’ve Learned

It’s amazing: when you’re a teenager all of your energy is focused on figuring out who you are and what your place in the world looks like. You build off what you already know and add in a few changes and new things. Then, in your 20s, you do it again. And in your 30s, you do it again. And, I’d imagine, in my 40s, I’ll do it again.

Right now I am 13 days away from turning 31 and I am already feeling the stirring of my personal preferences – prepping for another layer of self awareness.

I already know who I am is made up of my family (including pets), my violin, reading, friends and spending time in nature. What is new to me now is that there is almost nothing I want more than to be at home, with Mr.Big and our pets. Any absence reminds me how much I enjoy our home and our family. I was never a homebody before – but now it’s what I look forward to whenever I’m away – even if I’m just at work. I love that I love home enough to look forward to it every single day and I love that home is Mr.Big, the pups and me. (Also, I’ve noticed I have a new love for a clean, orderly home and I draw great personal satisfaction in making it so.)

What changes have you seen in yourself in this stage of life? Do you find you seem to readjust yourself every decade or so?

For more #MicroblogMondays, and to see how you can join too, hop on over to Stirrup Queens.